Hospitals

Japan: Are you ok? You look terrible.

Me: I feel pretty sick. Really crap actually. Where can i see a doctor?

Japan: At a hospital.

Me: I might go there now.

Japan: No, you can’t do that.

Me: Why not?

Japan: It’ll be closed.

Me: Closed?

Japan: Yeah.

Me: Why will it be closed?

Japan: It’s after 6pm.

Me: …?

Japan: What?

Me: Why is it closed after 6pm?

Japan: Because that’s what time hospitals close.

Me: Hospitals? Close? Hospitals close?

Japan: Yeah, why not? They’ve got doctors and nurses working in them. They’re high pressure, responsible jobs. They can’t work all the time.

Me: Remind me what time, exactly, your convenience stores close.

Japan: Erm…well…

Me: So i can buy a newspaper, an ice cream and a bottle of whiskey right now but i can’t go to the hospital?

Japan: Can’t you just wait?

Me: Do i have a choice?

Japan: Well, not really. But it’s not my fault. You’re the one who got sick outside of normal hospital working hours.

Me: So what happens if people get sick at the weekend?

Japan: Why would you get sick at the weekend? The hospital isn’t open.

Me: But –

Japan: Just wait until the week day. Wednesday’s are good. I think Monday’s are quite busy as they’re full of people who’ve been waiting all weekend to get sick.

Me: No. They’ve been waiting all weekend to go to the hospital.

Japan: But you can’t go to the hospital at the weekend.

Me: I know –

Japan: They’re not open.

Me: Yeah –

Japan: So you can’t be sick.

Me: This is nuts. What happens if i break a leg?

Japan: Call an ambulance.

Me: Where will they take me?

Japan: The hospital.

Me: Won’t it be shut?

Japan: Well, only if you’re stupid enough to break your leg when the hospitals are closed. Anyway, big major hospitals with accident and emergency wards will stay open. You know, for those idiots who have unforeseen injuries outside the specified Get Sick Period of 9am to 6pm Monday to Friday.

Me: Will anybody be there?

Japan: Yeah, sure, probably, why not, fingers crossed, good luck.

Me: …

Japan: What now?

Me: …

Japan: What!?

Me: I still feel really sick.

Japan: Well, that cheap convenience store whiskey isn’t going anywhere. Sleep on it. You’ll be fine tomorrow. It’s a weekday.

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January 7, 2013. Tags: , , , , , , , , . Uncategorized.

2 Comments

  1. ladyofthecakes replied:

    I so feel like ripping you off and having “Conversations with Spain”… not nearly as exotic, but bloody plenty to say!! Lol.
    Love your blog, thanks for posting.

  2. Brent replied:

    each city or ward has at least one clinic/hospital that is open.. usually for kids. Of course it’s totally out of your way, hard to find, impossible if you don’t have a car… etc.
    And there are a few hospitals/clinics around me that are open till 8:30, but not too many.
    Don’t you love some of their business hours? 9:00am-noon, 2pm-6pm..maybe. If you get there at 9am, you won’t be seen until 11:30 because you don’t have an appointment. If you get there at 8:30 or earlier, you might get be seen before 10:30. Who knows/remembers what day ..morning or afternoon they are off… it’s like that one sign that shows open hours for every day of the week, but they are all different! lol

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